I’m writing in response to the letter you just read about the 38 year old mother of 3 who just lost her husband to cancer. It really hit home because I am a 38-year-old stay-at-home/home-schooling mother of 2 girls, and I am also familiar with losing someone to cancer as pancreatic cancer took my mother’s life 3 years and 2 days ago. The purpose of this letter is an attempt to give you hope that you have gotten through to at least some of us.
Right now, my husband is spending his day off fishing with a buddy. If he never made it back home, I can rest assured that our last moments were loving, he knew how much I love him, and I know how much he loves me. You finally got through to me about 7 years ago when I learned to let the little things go. My husband was then (and still is now) a police officer, an officer in the military reserves, and a volunteer EMT-I. The risk of him not coming home when he heads to work each day is much too great to give the little stuff a moments thought when he is home with me. I’ve learned to appreciate stuff out on the bathroom counter and dirty clothes on the floor…it all means he’s home with me. So at least for this listener, if, God forbid, I am ever in that woman’s shoes I can know for certain I will go on with not a single regret about my marriage.
On a much lighter note, I wanted to tell you about my 7-year-old daughter. The other day you were talking about kids and picky eaters. You said something to the effect of not thinking there were any kids out there who don’t like mac and cheese. It made me laugh because she likes neither pasta or cheese. She’ll tolerate spaghetti if accompanied with meatballs and vegetables. She’d be much happier with a plate full of veggies and a bit of chicken or elk steak (my husband and I both hunt and stock our freezer ourselves). But for those dinners when I do make mac and cheese (home-made…we don’t eat instant food that comes in boxes) I am sure to include a couple of other dishes she will enjoy instead.
Take heart, Dr. Laura. You may not always hear from us, but many of us are listening and applying what we have learned listening to you.
All the best to you,